Monday, February 17, 2014

The Power of "What."



Sometimes the question "Why?" is a good one. 
Like, why can't we live in a more peaceful world? 
Or why did I eat all those cookies? 
Or why don't we call mustaches mouthbrows?

But there are times - especially during a crisis - when "why" may not the best puzzle to solve. 

When you're in an emotional entanglement, a difficult predicament or a physical hardship, asking "what" will do more.

Positive: What has directionality.
Negative: Why keeps you stuck in circular thinking.
Positive: What offers solutions.
Negative: Why offers no game plan.

So, the next time you find yourself in a bad place, use the power of "what."

Ask yourself:

"What can I do to make things better?

not

"Why is this happening to me?


Once the crisis is over THEN you can search for the "Why."

5 comments:

Wanda's Wings said...

I have found far too many "whys" unanswered."What" does seem like a better option.

Dr. Deb said...

I tend to agree. I save the whys for after I'm out of a bad situation.

acker said...

really helpful thanks. i'm really anxious, so instead of looking for the reasons, i am making myself comfortable as possible... and will find out whys later!

Dr. Deb said...

acker,
Exactly. First, tend to the "what" - what can I do, what can I change, what needs are required for me to feel better.... then ask the whys!

Megan Raymond, ASW said...

I appreciate the directive nature of asking "what?" Sometimes we can allow ourselves to get lost in the "why?" And although "why" can provide powerful information about ourselves, it can be unproductive.